it’s new years, and we all know what that means…. resolutions!
resolutions show up in many forms…. as a list of action steps, a final decision after a time of indecision, a vote in congress or by the PTA, a perfectly wrapped up conclusion to a great story, a melodic chord after a series of dissonant musical tones and, of course, as a list written with amazing fervor (and mixed levels of stick-ability), every january 1st.
but there’s another kind of resolution, the kind you consider when buying a camera or transferring an image file – the sharpness and quality of a picture. and, of course, the better the lens, the higher the resolution – and the higher the resolution, the clearer the picture.
as you are, perhaps, once again creating a list to propel you into a new you/year, i invite you to consider which lens you are currently using to view your life. when was your last upgrade? are you still using the one you inherited from your family… your culture… your experiences as a young person? is it shaped by lack or by abundance? entitlement or gratitude? criticism or acceptance? isolation or connection? whatever it’s designed to capture, it will surely find. and what condition is the lens in? has it been clouded with stories stemming from disappointment, unfulfilled dreams, betrayals or harsh judgments of self and others? is it painted over with rules and expectations that no longer serve you? perhaps it’s time to acknowledge that the current picture of yourself has become blurry.
but luckily, my dear, that blur is not who you really are.
what if we could wipe our lenses fully clean, or better yet, upgrade to a whole new lens – one that focuses and finds the gifts of our family, culture, and early life? perhaps we could finally see ourselves as we once did, before we inherited all the rules, shoulds/should-nots, disappointments and defenses?
today, in this moment, you can make this upgrade simply by making a firm (dare i say resolute?) choice to shift your focus, bringing compassion to whatever you perceive is *wrong* or needs to be fixed (with yourself… others.. the world) and commitment to amplifying the feelings that are expansive and freeing (for yourself… others… the world).
with this higher resolution, others can see you more clearly too. the beauty of your essence will be what shines through, rather than worn down armor or defenses hiding your true self.
i have offered an exercise below that you might use to support you in this upgrade. i truly do see the light, even when it’s just shining thru the cracks, of every single one of you. you are radiant and here to give and receive unique gifts on this planet. thank you for being one of the gifts i receive and supporting me with your presence and engagement.
loving you, resolutely,
*****creating a higher resolution picture for 2016!
wondering where to start your upgrade process? as you go through the following prompts, notice which ones pop out at you or evoke something deeper. write out your answers, or do the exercise with a friend, in the form of a discussion. afterward, if you feel inspired to make a more traditional resolution list, use your answers to these questions to help inspire a higher resolution reflection. as much as possible, avoid creating yet another list of rules/shoulds to follow. the list will be more useful if it feels inspiring and energizing – anchoring you to what you most desire to feel. once completed, share it with another friend (and/or me!) — we all know selfies are lower resolution! decorate the list in a way that pleases your eye and put it somewhere that you will bring daily engagement with it.
- what thoughts feel more spacious and freeing to have?
- what activities do i feel better during and after doing?
- what are at least three feelings that i crave more of in my life?
- what are ways in which i can bring those feelings into my life right now?
- what are a few things i loved to do when i was younger?
- how did i feel when doing these things?
- what, if anything, is stopping me from doing those things now? what else might evoke similar feelings as these things?
- what do i think needs to change in myself (and/or others?) in order for me to be happy?
- what do i imagine i would feel if that change happened? how can i actually bring that feeling into my life right now, even if this never changed?
- what are some new year’s resolutions that i’ve made in years past, but didn’t stick to?
- what’s the feeling state behind these resolutions? how might these resolutions be upgraded?
- are there parts of myself that i think need “fixing”? is there a deeper emotion that these parts are in need of?
- how can i light up the lives of people around me? how does this feel for me?
- how can i offer more of my gifts to the world in a way that feels energizing and sustainable?
the list might be as simple as two or three emotions that you’d like to experience on a regular basis or as complex as a whole new blueprint for living a more resonant, energized life! i just went through and did the exercise myself, and after coming up with lots of answers (some of which surprised me!) i came up with this list for myself, which i will include below for you to get an idea.